Radio Friend,
Bat Guano.

You can now listen! To Bat Guano's SwaG! every Wednesday, 9 p.m. Eastern, or the rest of WIDR's programing at any time, on the WORLD WIDE WEBS once again! Go to WIDR and follow the instructions.


Let her go...

The song that's been going on in my mind: "St. James Infirmary" Click the link for history, analysis.
I went down to St. James Infirmary, Saw my baby there. She was stretched out on a long white table, so sweet, so cold, so bare.

Let her go, let her go, God bless her. Wherever she may be, She can search this whole wide world over, She ain't never gonna find another man like me.

When I die, I want you to dress me in straight-laced shoes Box-back coat and a Stetson hat Put a twenty- dollar gold piece on my watch chain, So the boys will know that I died standin' pat.

Bass Wolf, RIP

Billy (Bass Wolf) of Guitar Wolf died yesterday.



Whiskers Gone Wild!

Eeewww.... Wait, it's not nasty. Or at least most people would say it's not nasty. I would be proud to be one of these well-endowed gentlemen. But I don't have the patience to build mine up to that crazy huge size. And imagine the stares of shock and admiration you'd get on the street!


What's Going On?

Really, what's going on?
Before he saw the polls, Tom DeLay declared that "one thing that God has brought to us is Terri Schiavo, to help elevate the visibility of what is going on in America." Now he and his party, shocked by the public's negative reaction to their meddling, want to move on. But we shouldn't let them. The Schiavo case is, indeed, a chance to highlight what's going on in America.

One thing that's going on is a climate of fear for those who try to enforce laws that religious extremists oppose. Randall Terry, a spokesman for Terri Schiavo's parents, hasn't killed anyone, but one of his former close associates in the anti-abortion movement is serving time for murdering a doctor. George Greer, the judge in the Schiavo case, needs armed bodyguards.

Another thing that's going on is the rise of politicians willing to violate the spirit of the law, if not yet the letter, to cater to the religious right.

Everyone knows about the attempt to circumvent the courts through "Terri's law." But there has been little national exposure for a Miami Herald report that Jeb Bush sent state law enforcement agents to seize Terri Schiavo from the hospice - a plan called off when local police said they would enforce the judge's order that she remain there.


Oh, Shit

If you got hit by the tsunami last December, get the fuck inland, now.


Worst Toy Ever

The Swing Wing!

Klipner's a TV Star!

Kalamazoo folks air their feelings about a guy who now has a basic cable show. They knew when...


Go here, watch this. "Comic Strip" with Brigitte Bardot and Serge Gainsbourg.


Shut the FOX up.

FOX Blocker

For only $8.95 you get an easy-to-instal thing that keeps FOX's right-wing, biased, dishonest, disingenuous bullshit from your TV, and, "With every order placed, will send an e-mail in your name to the TOP 10 advertisers at FOX News letting them know that yet another subscriber has opted out of FOX News."


In Other News

Go here, and look at the computer screen in the photo of the UN meeting. There's a laptop open, and on the screen you see...

Now, if this were a Fark deal, that would be an obvious juvenile but humorous bit of Photoshopping. But this is Al Jazeera's site. Questions arise...

GOP Has Schiavoed Itself

Yes, I'm sick of the story, too. But what's interesting is how Republicans have managed to split themselves in two (or maybe this is just now showing a split that was always there, but they just agreed to ignore it) parts, the regular conservative "I Just Want Those Bums In Washington To Stay Off My Back" Republicans, and the freakish fanatical fuckhead right-wing Republicans.

A regular (as far as I can tell) Republican writes in How Far Will They Go To Kill Conservatism?:

The other day, in a conversation with my father, I stated that I was really afraid how far the radicals in my party would go to make sure that Terri Schiavo remains a bed-bound vegetable for the next 40 years. I had predicted that they would convince/coerce someone in the law enforcement community to arrest and charge Michael Schiavo with abuse (or anything, really). They then could 'rescue' Terri, because allowing her to die would be 'destroying evidence.'....

.... How radical are these folks? I predicted they would charge (Michael) Schiavo with a crime. I was wrong. Instead, their full-on assault of the judiciary at both the state and federal level as well as their perversion of the legislative branches, and their misuse of the Federal and State Executive branches by Brothers Bush was not enough, and now they are attempting to use state level agencies, the ones relied upon for the non-partisan delivery of services, as a weapon....

While many wail and gnash their teeth and pour copious tears upon the ground over whether or not to "save" poor Terri, the radical actions of the federal government become the secondary issue, at least in the mainstream media. Look -- we've got congress and Bush ruling on one case, trying to overturn one case. It's radical.

And the somewhat left-leaning experts on the Middle East say...

The cynical use by the US Republican Party of the Terri Schiavo case repeats, whether deliberately or accidentally, the tactics of Muslim fundamentalists and theocrats in places like Egypt and Pakistan. These tactics involve a disturbing tendency to make private, intimate decisions matters of public interest and then to bring the courts and the legislature to bear on them. President George W. Bush and Republican congressional leaders like Tom Delay have taken us one step closer to theocracy on the Muslim Brotherhood model.

The Muslim fundamentalists use a provision of Islamic law called "bringing to account" (hisba). As Al-Ahram weekly notes, "Hisba signifies a case filed by an individual on behalf of society when the plaintiff feels that great harm has been done to religion." Hisba is a medieval idea that had all but lapsed when the fundamentalists brought it back in the 1970s and 1980s.

The above goes on with examples from Islamic countries, cases like the one where a husband and wife were forced to divorce because one wasn't Muslim. And it ends with the kicker quote, "Ayatollah DeLay isn't different from his counterparts in Iran."

It's radical, it's cynical, it's big-government intervention on individuals' lives, it's an abuse of powers, it's government acting on behalf of religion.

Howabout, next year, around Nov. 2006, we throw the bums out?

As a DJ, Can I Get a Gig as a Rock 'n' Roller?

Ko Melina, who you saw thrashin' around with the Dirtbombs at the Kraftbrau last month, is going to be a DJ on the Underground Garage Channel on Sirius Satellite Radio.

Look at all those great disk jockeys, well known for being radio personalities and for their taste in music selections: Joan Jett, Handsome Dick Manitoba, Kim Fowley and former Rolling Stones manager Andrew Loog Oldham. All lead by Little Steven.

Wait... aren't these all music people? They may be fine DJs, but let me sing with the Blackhearts and see how long they'd keep me on stage...


Happy Easter

Oh my God, we really are in a theocracy.

Are the Republicans so obsessed with maintaining control over all branches of government, and are the Democrats so emasculated about not having any power, that they are willing to turn the nation into a wholly owned subsidiary of the church?

The more dogma-driven activists, self-perpetuating pols and ratings-crazed broadcast media prattle about "faith," the less we honor the credo that a person's relationship with God should remain a private matter.


It's An Inspirational Feeding Tube Of Chicken Soup For The Whole World's Soul

Get Your War On gets its feeding tube on.
My wife and I made our living wills last night. Mine says that if I fall into a persistent vegetative state, and Tom Delay comes within a hundred miles of me, I am to turn into a zombie and rip his fucking head off.





I don't look like no swishy little John Travolta pretty movie-makin' lady's boy...

The SwaG! Why-The-Hell-Not Easter Egg from us to you, "Ugly," by Johnny Meeskite.

Oh, joy. This is my personal theme song.


Dirty Blues and Kalamazoo

After finding that the original nasty "Stoop Down" song on this nasty record by Chick Willis came from Kalamazoo's La Val Records, I found that they're still on the map.

And Jimmy Lynch, a good friend of Rudy Ray More, also recorded for La Val. This record, "recorded live at the famous El Grotto bar in Battle Creek, Michigan at one of its fabulous Sunday afternoon matinees," and released in 1961, may be the first record ever to contain the word "fuck."

We here at SwaG! salute our hometown of Kalamazoo, Mich., population 77,145 dirty motherfuckers. Sa - Lute!


Freak Out, Baby

This groovy cat is your connection, baby, to get your hands on a stash that hasn't been freakin' out the squares since 1967. It's, like, a downloadable magazine, a little capsule containing a past purple haze to pass through your future fantastic computerized bloggertized bastardized internetted wayback machine, baby! From the Monkeys to the Mothers, the Fugs and the Mammas and the Airplane and the ... oh, man, what was I talkin' about again?

Tom's Records

Tom Waits' 20 Favorite Albums Includes fun tangents.

Monk said 'There is no wrong note, it has to do with how you resolve it'. He almost sounded like a kid taking piano lessons. I could relate to that when I first started playing the piano, because he was decomposing the music while he was playing it. It was like demystifying the sound, because there is a certain veneer to jazz and to any music, after a while it gets traffic rules, and the music takes a backseat to the rules. It's like aerial photography, telling you that this is how we do it. That happens in folk music too. Try playing with a bluegrass group and introducing new ideas. Forget about it. They look at you like you're a communist.

Someday Tom Waits will be allowed to record new ideas with a bluegrass group. And I will buy that disk. Someday.

This Just In

Mullets found in Indiana

Next in this series: Hockey found in Canada, fish found in lake, meth found in trailer park...

(Just checking... Yup, it's still there.)

Old News

Happy Anniversary.
LONDON (AFP) - The head of Britain's foreign intelligence agency told Prime Minister Tony Blair (news - web sites) that the case for war in Iraq (news - web sites) was being "fixed" by Washington to suit US policy, according to a BBC documentary.

MI6 supremo Richard Dearlove briefed Blair and a group of ministers on the United States' determination to launch the invasion nine months before hostilities began in March 2003, the BBC programme will claim on Sunday.

After attending a briefing in Washington, he told the meeting that war was "inevitable", according to The Sunday Times newspaper.

"The facts and intelligence" were being "fixed round the policy" by US President George W. Bushs administration, Dearlove said.


Brazilian Freakout, '69

Wow. Bedazzled's got a video of Brazil's greatest psychedelic band Os Mutantes. Starts out hippy-dippy, then they get close to a Velvet Underground-style freakout!


All I can say about this case is that we need to give a big dose of Shut The Fuck Up and Mind Your Own Fucking Business to those who would use a half-dead woman as a political pawn. They're at the same level as those who would rape a person in a coma.
"ABC News obtained talking points circulated among Senate Republicans explaining why they should vote to intervene in the Schiavo case. Among them, that it is an important moral issue and the "pro-life base will be excited," and that it is a "great political issue — this is a tough issue Democrats."

Virgins Have Sex, Study Finds

Teens who take "abstinence pledges" get naughty. They are just as likely to get STDs than teens who don't. And Our President, George W. Bush wants to shovel your tax dollars into abstinence-only education.


Amazon Reviews by MusicalGenius

Every product has a story behind it, and a strong, informed opinion.
Apparantly, I was extremely upset because I smashed my hand through the table and had to go to the hospital. If they would have just put Hank William's Football song on this CD, 39 stitches could have been prevented.

Republicans in Congress Approve of Gay Whore "Journalists" With Fake Names

Rep. Sensenbrenner, Rep. Coble, Rep. (Lamar) Smith, Rep. Gallegly, Rep. Goodlatte, Rep. Chabot, Rep. Lungren, Rep. Jenkins, Rep. Cannon, Rep. Bachus, Rep. Inglis, Rep. Hostettler, Rep. Green, Rep. Keller, Rep. Issa, Rep. Flake, Rep. Pence, Rep. Forbes, Rep. King, Rep. Franks and Rep. Gohmert, all Republicans, vote for allowing gay male prostitutes with fake names and no real journalist background into the White House to ask the Press Secretary and the President questions, as long as those questions are pro-Bush and as long as the prostitute has the backing of right-wing propaganda organizations which have no connections, none at all, to Karl Rove. No, really, they see no problem here.


Disco Apache!

Your SwaG! Out-of-Nowhere Disco Video of the Week

Featuring authentic Native American dress.

"Great warriors, riders of the flames...!

Update: I found this here, and since it is kinda rude to just link to a huge file on their site, we've put a copy on ours. Gee, I wonder how much of that bandwidth stuff this'll cost me...


Bloggerty SwaG!

Okay, first off, I want to let everyone know I'm sick of the word "blog." It seems that every gay prostitute Republican has one. And so do I. That Bat's Brain thing has been up forever, back when the word "blog" was something best used in the company of geeks. But I realize it's missing something, the ability for you all to slap up a comment to the posts. Someone a few weeks ago wrote a email saying they liked the radio show, but why do I have to disrespect Our President, George W. Bush, all the time? I basically wrote back that it was because I hate the motherfeltcher. This give-and-take was exhausting on the part of all. Making the adult communication of well-reasoned thoughts easier should be a goal of all of us. And with this, I think I've done my part. Feel free to comment.